


That's the Way Love Goes

by ro_shepard



Category: Mass Effect
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-11-24
Updated: 2017-02-12
Packaged: 2018-09-01 20:52:09
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 11,678
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8637655
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ro_shepard/pseuds/ro_shepard
Summary: A story of budding love between a lonely commander and a guarded assassin.This story will start out General/Teen in rating, but will finish with Mature content.





	1. What's a Drell?

**Author's Note:**

> This story will be a mixture of game canon and AU. I hope that it is generic enough that it can be enjoyed by all FemShep Shrios fans.
> 
> This story is independent of my Misadventures series.

The commander furrowed her brow as she scrolled through the biographical information of her next recruit - The Assassin. Shepard had gathered a small group in the Normandy's Briefing Room to discuss the risks and approach for this recruitment.

"Where's the rest?" Shepard asked, having read the brief description on her datapad. It was purely factual - no mental assessment, no historical details, just straight to the point.

 _Name: Thane Krios_  
_Species: Drell_  
_Height: 185 cm  
_ _Weight: Unknown_

_Specifications: Quick kill biotics specialist; Expert sniper_

_Description: Thane Krios is a drell trained from childhood as an elite assassin, proficient on both long-range sniping skills and close infiltration. He has slowed his activities in recent years, but is rumored to have a target on Illium._

"That's all the information Cerberus could obtain, Shepard. We were lucky to even get that," Miranda informed. Garrus Vakarian and Jacob Taylor remained silent while Kasumi Goto fiddled away at a datapad of her own.

Shepard frowned. If she was going to freely welcome and harbor a professional assassin, she wanted to know as much as possible up front - at least enough to know if she needed to sleep with one eye open.

"I don't like this," Shepard confessed, rubbing her shoulder out of habit. "What's a drell anyway? I've never heard of that species."

"Apparently _this_ is a drell," Kasumi said matter-of-factly as she approached the commander's side. "If they're all like this, I think we should recruit a few more drell. It couldn't hurt. It'd be for morale."

Shepard cocked an eyebrow and brought her attention to the figure on the datapad. Kasumi had found a random extranet image of a striking being. The species  was certainly exotic - a cross between reptilian, amphibian, and... avian? This particular drell, who was lean in form, was hued in shades of rich blues with purple markings along his head. Large, black eyes stared hauntingly  into the abyss, reminiscent of the galaxy itself. Shepard wasn't quite sold on drop-dead gorgeous, but this drell was attractive. She gave an approving nod.

"Let me see," Miranda said, moving around to Shepard's other side. "Not bad. They certainly seem colorful."

Garrus rolled his eyes, "Ladies, please. Can we please get back to the mission?"

Jacob nodded in agreement, "Thank you."

"No need for jealousy boys, we just wanted a better idea of what we'd be dealing with," Miranda teased in amusement.

"Yeah, Krios might not even look like this guy," Shepard added.

"That'd be a shame," Kasumi quipped.

Jacob scoffed and crossed his arms, "Well, if we're voting on this, I don't think we need Krios. We already have a few strong biotics and you and Garrus are unmatched in sniping."

"Then why would the Illusive Man include Krios' dossier, Jacob?" Miranda asked. She watched as Jacob leaned back defensively and she continued. "It's worth it to find him just to see what he can do."

"I agree, Shepard," Garrus drawled and to Jacob's surprise. "We should give him a chance. Shepard could use another sniper to compete with her on the field. It's not fair that I outshoot her every time. Besides, we need all the help we can get in this damn fight."

"Alright," Shepard began, ignoring the turian's remark. She made a note on her datapad in the assassin's file. "I'll track Krios down and talk with him. Miranda and Kasumi will accompany me."

Garrus cocked his head back and gave an amused look, "Well, just be sure that you all actually get the job done. I'll be on comms if you need me... or a drool bib."

Shepard crinkled her nose mockingly. Garrus was her confidant, her best friend, her most trusted ally, and witty tormentor. Since taking down Saren over two years ago, and with having been recently reunited, Shepard could not imagine her life without the archangel and his wisecracks.

"I can always count on you Garrus to have my back," Shepard returned.

Jacob shook his head.

"We'll be docked at Nos Astra in twelve hours, Shepard. How do you want to play this?" Miranda asked, pulling up her omni tool.

"We need information on the ground," Shepard responded, "and it just so happens, I know the right broker."

* * *

"Negative! He's already past us!" The Eclipse squad leader shouted frantically. "We don't know where he is or who the team is firing behind him! Just set up the damn sentries. No one gets past that bridge!"

That was the last command the squad leader gave as Kasumi suddenly appeared at his side. He was down in an instant as Shepard and Miranda sprinted forward.

"Whoever this guy is, he'd better be worth all this trouble!" Shepard panted as she popped a new thermal clip into her Avenger. The entire mission had been pure chaos from the start. With fighting mecs and Eclipse mercs, it seemed like everyone was shooting at any and everything, yet no one had eyes on the assassin.

Krios was there - Shepard knew that with certainty and not solely because of the Eclipse comm chatter. There had been three occasions where Shepard and her team had encountered salarian workers, locked safely away in storage rooms. Yet, none of the workers could describe their protector in clarity - only vague descriptions of a shadowy figure that moved too fast for the eye to follow. It was bizarre and yet, comforting in some ways to the commander to know that the man she was pursuing was at least considerate. Shepard's curiosity was getting to her as they ran toward the base of the bridge that joined the two Dantius towers.

"Stick to cover!" Shepard shouted as she charged forward, taking out a merc and crouching down behind some crates. Miranda's biotics flared, accompanying the gunfire, and Kasumi continued with her disappearing act. The three human females pushed forward into the Eclipse defensive line and began to cross the bridge.

"Sentries!" Kasumi shouted as the robotic weapons took their position high on the far side of the pass.

"I'm on it!" Shepard responded as she quickly swapped the Avenger for her beloved M-97 Viper. The rifle molded perfectly into her grip and she made short work of the robotic guards. After removing the last of the Eclipse mercs, the trio were standing outside the main doors of Nassana  Dantius' penthouse.

"This is it," Shepard said as she took her position in front of the door's control panel. Miranda and Kasumi flanked her at the door.

"We're with you, Shep," Kasumi assured and Miranda nodded in agreement, gripping her weapon tightly.

Shepard slammed the controls with the side of her fist and stepped inside.

* * *

One moment Shepard had been trying to convince Nassana Dantius that she was not there to kill her. The next moment, Nassana was dead and Shepard had finally come in contact with the assassin she had been seeking for the past two hours.

Thane Krios was tall, lean, yet strong as had been made apparent by the display that had been over within the blink of an eye. Shepard had only seen a blur of black and green before Nassana's security guards, and Nassana herself, fell one after the other. The setting Illium sun obscured the drell's face as he posed Nassana's lifeless form onto her desk, almost ritualistically, and bowed his head.

"That was quite the entrance," Kasumi chimed, breaking the awed silence that had settled after the assassin's entrance.

Krios did not acknowledge the comment in any way, continuing his ceremony.

Shepard, tired and with worn patience, stepped forward, "Hello? I was hoping to talk to you."

The assassin looked up briefly toward the three human females, formulating a plan to take them all down should the need arise. He relaxed slightly, confident that it would be a brief encounter. He had cautiously watched the trio from afar as they trailed him, freeing the salarian workers that he had moved out of the path of fire. These humans were not out to kill him - that was made clear; however, he was still unsure of the way he was being so adamantly pursued.

"I apologize, but prayers for the wicked must not be forsaken," Krios stated, referring to his ritual.

 Shepard still could not make out the drell's face with the blinding sun, but the low, smooth rumble of his voice intrigued her. She raised an eyebrow, "Do you really think that she deserves it?" she asked. She had, had the displeasure of encountering Nassana and her slaver sister during her pursuit of Saren. The galaxy was better off without them.

The assassin frowned slightly and shook his head, "Not for her, for me," he said, slightly annoyed. He holstered his weapon. "The measure of an individual can be difficult to discern based on actions alone," Krios defended. "Take you for instance - all this destruction, chaos... I was curious to see how far you'd go to find me." He cleared the desk, leaving nothing between himself and his pursuers. His dark eyes stared cooly at the human commander, challenging her as he allowed her and the rest of her team to see him clearly for the first time.

"Well, here I am."

Shepard held the assassin's gaze. Her heart quickened slightly by his quiet approach. She recalled her previous comment to Garrus and Jacob about the assassin and the attractive extranet drell they had been critiquing.

_Yeah, Krios might not even look like this guy._

She had been right. Thane Krios looked nothing like the extranet drell. With his rounded, chiseled face, his emerald and dark green shimmering scales, his confident pose... Thane Krios was far, far, sexier. Little did Shepard know that she would soon be drawn to the tight, leather-wearing assassin, just like a moth drawn to a deadly flame. 


	2. Not Your Average Paid Gun

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shepard apologizes to her new recruit. Thane's first mission with the team. Shepard addresses formalities.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apologies for the lack of updates. I don't have access to a computer regularly, so I handwrite all of my stories in a notebook first.

Shepard shook her head and sighed as she rested her hands on the briefing room's table.

That did not go well.

Operative Taylor had aggressively interrogated Krios upon his arrival, and while the assassin maintained a sense of professional courtesy toward Jacob's accusations, Krios did have his limits.

_I came here to do a job, Mr. Taylor, not to defend myself against rumors and unrefined accusations. I can still leave._

The commander pressed down and stretched out her back. _Dammit Jacob,_ she thought to herself. She didn't dislike the Cerberus operative, but there were times when his defensive and suspicious nature truly pissed her off. This was one of those times.

Zaeed Massani, the veteran mercenary and co-founder of the Blue Suns, was more of a paid gun for hire than Krios - especially since the assassin had agreed to join the Collectors mission gratis - yet, Jacob had not started an altercation with Massani.

_What gives?_

Shepard finished up her mission notes and closed the files on her datapad.

 _I'll apologize._ Shepard convinced herself. She would, but would wait a few hours. Krios needed to report to Dr. Chakwas and she needed a shower.

* * *

Thane stepped into the life support area and closed his eyes. This was most unusual for him to have agreed on a job so... abruptly. Yes, it was true that he did value innocent lives, but this... going against the mysterious Collectors with a young, human commander was a damned fool crusade. He took a deep breath and opened his eyes, bending down to pull his weapons crate from beneath the modest cot. Freckled, emerald fingers manipulated the locks and Thane looked over his trusted accessories- two Vipers and two Shurikens - extensions of his own form. He carefully removed them and set them up on a nearby display, mission-ready, for whenever the commander decided to call.

While Shepard had sought him out to save lives, truthfully, Thane only took them. He delivered those who became his targets to Kalahira, the goddess of oceans and the afterlife. He was the Arm of Death to those that deserved it. He would help Shepard, as he promised, and if his gods were merciful, he would be delivered as well, granted passage to the shores along the endless Sea. A small glimmer of golden amber caught his eye and Thane set his eyes on the small, smooth stone that was nestled in the corner of the crate. Seemingly out of place, its presence had created a groove in the casing, forming a home for itself over the course of many missions. The stone's coloring was reminiscent of a magnificent sunset - swirls of gold, orange, and red. Its presence was a reminder of a life forsaken a long time ago.

Thane quietly closed the case and pushed it back under the cot.

* * *

Shepard smoothed her hair back as she sat at the console next to Dr. Karin Chakwas, the Normandy's assigned medical physician. Yeoman Kelly Chambers stood off to the side with a datapad in hand. This was a standard meeting after picking up a new recruit.  Dr. Chakwas would give her professional opinion if an individual was physically fit to serve on the mission. Kelly would give a basic psych analysis.

"Physically, Mr. Krios is fit to serve, Commander," Dr. Chakwas informed. "I know from your report that you stated that he had divulged a terminal condition. From what I've been told by Professor Solus, it's confined to the drell species and it's non-communicable. As long as Mr. Krios stays physically active and doesn't subject himself to overly humid conditions, he'll be just fine."

"That's good to hear, Dr. Chakwas. Thank you, as always," Shepard said, nodding her head as she looked over the rest of the briefing.

"I cannot tell you how much of an asset Mordin is, especially in interpreting some of these results. I'm afraid that I haven't encountered many drell. They're a fascinating species," Dr. Chakwas added.

"I'll second that, Doctor," Kelly chimed.

Shepard turned toward her yeoman and raised an eyebrow. Kelly was forever interested in the galaxy's different sapient beings. Her curiosity often lead to awkward comments and socially-ambiguous questions, but for the most part, the Normandy crew were understanding. Shepard was also pretty sure that the young yeoman had a crush on her turian XO. Not that it mattered as Garrus was not physically attracted to humans - at least that's what Shepard had observed. Still, the yeoman had been trying her best to get his attention.

"What is your assessment, Kelly?" Shepard asked.

"Thane seems like a great addition, Commander. He's fully committed to the mission and understands the risks. It's almost as if he's looking forward to fighting. He is extremely guarded though, not too interested in social interaction or in answering questions," Kelly responded.

"Are you sure it was the standard questions that Krios had a problem with and not the ones based on your own curiosity?" Shepard mused.

Kelly blushed slightly, "I... sorry, Commander. He's just... I mean, I've never seen..."

"Spit it out, Yeoman."

Kelly took a slow, calming breath, "I've never met a drell before, Commander. I was distracted by the opportunity. From your report Thane seems so deadly, but sensitive spiritually. I don't know if I find him scary or incredibly sexy."

Dr. Chakwas shook her head in amusement and spun her chair back around to her monitors.

"It seems like Krios is making quite the first impression on a lot of people, but let's try to keep things professional, okay? I don't want to scare the guy off," Shepard stated. She knew exactly what the yeoman was referring to, as she herself was captivated by the drell, but she had a mission to run. "Thank you Kelly for your report. You're dismissed."

Kelly saluted and turned heel back for the CIC.

"So when will Mr. Krios pass the Vakarian test, Commander?" Dr. Chakwas asked, amused.

Shepard smiled and shook her head, "I'm sure that'll be soon enough."

"Just be careful, Commander. Scrapes and broken bones over such silly competitions. There's only so much medi-gel onboard, you know?"

Shepard placed an assuring hand on the doctor's shoulder and made her way out of Medical. It was time for that apology.

Her name was called from across the way.

"Hey Commander, thanks again for those provisions!" the ship's cook shouted excitedly.

Shepard inclined her head and waived, "Glad that I could help, Gardner. It's the little things, right?"

Gardner laughed, "I'll say. Good food makes for good morale. I'd think that every little bit would help."

Shepard nodded in agreement.

"Well, back to it," the cook said as he began to rummage through the cabinets.

Shepard left him to his work as she made her way down to hall to Life Support. She noticed that the door controls were red and paused for a moment, debating on whether or not to disturb her latest recruit. Finally, opting to get the apology out of the way, she pressed the panel, pinging for permission. Her first conversation with the drell had been a dance in interest and motives over the outlandish mission being presented - especially since Krios was not driven by career advancement or credits. The professional assassin had agreed to help her solely to save as many innocent lives as possible. He was...

"Commander."

...not your average paid gun.

Two large, black, onyx and emerald eyes stared questioningly at her as Shepard straightened her posture. She was surprised to realize that she was a little nervous. Assassin or not, Shepard was rarely intimidated by the physical presence of another, but there was something about the drell's endless stare that made her feel exposed. She wondered what those dark eyes made of her.

"Krios, do you have a few minutes to talk?" Shepard asked, shoving her nerves aside.

Thane nodded and offered a hand inside. He followed the commander soundlessly as she made her way into the quaint space. His eyes watched her every move, from the display case, to the core window, and back to his weapons.

"What did you wish to discuss, Commander?" Thane asked, taking a seat at the small table. A single black and white mug was its only inhabitant.

Shepard turned to face the assassin, yet remained standing. She stepped into her commander persona and clasped her hands behind her back, "Foremost, I wanted to apologize to you for Operative Taylor's behavior," she offered. "That is not how I run a crew and I have addressed the matter with Taylor directly. I'm trying to gather the best for this fight and I'm happy to have you, Krios. Thank you for staying with us."

Thane's face was unreadable as he weighed the commander's gesture of peace. He folded his hands onto the table, "I appreciate the gesture, Commander, but your apology is not needed," his voice rumbled smoothly, "quite frankly, I'm used to making others feel... uncomfortable." He continued to hold the commander's gaze and watched as she waivered in her stance, the slightest of movement. He was curious about Shepard, about how the small, human woman before him was the source of so many legends, stories. He had seen her skills on Illium, bold, brash, messy.

Thane continued, "Everyone seems to be aware of what I do for a living. Caution is... understandable." He leaned back into his chair, relaxing slightly, "Besides, I'm not here to impress anyone or to make friends. My work will speak for itself."

"Well, from the little that I've seen of you in action, I'm already a believer, Krios," Shepard responded with a touch of humor.

Thane inclined his head.

A faint orange glow entered the room as Shepard pulled up her omni. "In the penthouse, you mentioned your condition, yet Dr. Chakwas has cleared you for duty."

"My condition... it's called Kepral's Syndrome. I should be relatively healthy for another eight to twelve months," Thane informed. "I imagine that will in that time, we'll either be victorious against your Collectors or dead."

 _Was that... dark humor?_ Shepard wondered to herself. The stoic drell was difficult to read.

"Hmm, I suppose you're right," Shepard agreed, "but to help increase out survival odds, I'm open to upgrade suggestions for the Normandy. If you think of anything Krios, please let me or EDI know."

"EDI?" Thane inquired.

"EDI is the Normandy's AI. She helped to identify these quarters for you."

"Ah, yes," Thane nodded, "I will review the Normandy's specifications and have a report for you soon, Commander."

"Very good. Thank you, Krios," Shepard said as she prepared to taker her leave.

Thane watched as the commander's bit her lip. Hesitation. "Was there anything more, Commander?" he asked, offering the opportunity to disclose whatever was occupying her thoughts.

"We... try to have dinner together in the mess when we aren't out on a mission. Just fellowship for this unique mission. 2000 ship time. I know there seems to be some apprehension on all sides about your presence here, Krios, but you're part of the crew now and are welcome to join us," Shepard offered, "I know you said that you're not in this to make friends, but I wanted to put that out there."

"Thank you, Commander. I shall keep your hospitality in mind," Thane said as he stood from his chair. "If  there is nothing else, you'd wish to discuss, I must begin my meditations. It's... how I debrief after a mission."

Shepard tried to contain her surprise, but she felt her eyebrows raise. First prayers and now meditations. Thane Krios seems to be less of an assassin and more of a badass monk - a badass monk in body forming leather. She offered a polite smile.

"Of course. Thank you for letting me have a moment. EDI will inform you of any upcoming mission briefings, in addition to helping you around the Normandy," Shepard said as she palmed the  door controls.

Thane bowed slightly in gratitude as the doors slid shut. He knelt in prayer as he began another of his personal rituals.

* * *

 "So how'd the mission go, Shepard?" Garrus asked, watching as a multitude of fish swam around the illuminated aquarium. He never quite understood Shepard's obsession with having captive aquatic animals, especially, when they didn't seem to last long in her care. But, he did enjoy watching them while he could. It was relaxing.

Shepard pressed the feeder button. "Good, but very bizarre. I've never had a mission like it, Garrus. Fighting through a half-built tower, chasing mechs and mercs, while we all were chasing after Krios. It was nuts - you'd have liked it."

"Well, I wouldn't have wanted to interfere with you ladies and your drell _research_ ," Garrus said, quoting his fingers in the air. He had been spending way too much time with the commander. He continued, "Any problems recruiting him?"

Shepard shook her head, "Not really. He agreed to take on the mission for free," she said as she plopped down on one end of the sofa. Garrus was seated on the other. "it seems like some kind of penance. Krios is very... religious."

"Religious?" Garrus asked, his mandibles flared with his curiosity. "What makes you say that?"

"He prayed after killing Nassana."

"He what?"

"You heard me, Garrus, he prayed after killing her - like for forgiveness or something," Shepard said, rubbing her shoulder.

"Praying for forgiveness and not accepting payment for a job... you sure this guy is an assassin, Shepard?" the turian teased.

Shepard closed her eyes briefly and scoffed, "Yeah," she breathed, recalling how quickly the drell had taken out Nassana's security detail, "yeah, I'm sure."

"How'd he fair with Jacob's debriefing?"

Shepard groaned, "Jacob was completely out of line - down right rude. I had to apologize to Krios afterward."

Garrus shook his head, "Tight ass operatives, questioning everything, worrying about policy and regulations... who needs that?"

Shepard laughed, "Yeah! No wonder you two get along so well."

"Hey, I just know what it's like to be young and immersed in bureaucratic red tape," the turian drawled.

"I know, I know. We've all been there."

"Well... when is Krios going to pass the Vakarian test?"

A small smile pulled at the commander's lips, "You know Dr. Chakwas asked me that very question," Shepard said in amusement.

"Of course she did," Garrus returned, "she's a woman of science, observation. She recognizes the importance of adequate skill assessment."

Shepard shook her head, "Next mission. We'll take Krios out and see how he does in a team."

Garrus nodded, "Good. Well, while you ladies were out chasing extranet drell fantasies today, I got you something."

Shepard raised an eyebrow, "What? Why?"

The turian leaned back against the cushion, "With the whole extranet thing earlier... that was the most I've seen you joke around since Horizon. It was good to see you back. I wanted to celebrate."

Shepard sighed. _Horizon_. That mission had been emotionally draining for two reasons. One - that was the first time she had witnessed the horrors of the Collectors first hand. The other reason was running into Kaidan. She had shut down after his accusations, after witnessing the cold look of betrayal in his dark brown eyes - the mistrust. Despite everything that they had been through together - Ash, Saren, the Council, from comrade, to friend, to lover, now to someone who was no  longer trusted...

"He's scared, Shepard," Garrus said quietly. "Not that being scared excuses his stupidity, but he loved you, _loves you_ , and you died. To suddenly have you back, it's messing with him."

"I know, Garrus," Shepard said, dragging both hands across her face. "I died. I didn't ask to be brought back, but here I am, taking on another impossible galactic fight."

"Do you still love him?" Garrus asked.

Shepard cast her eyes down into her lap, "I... I don't know. It felt nice to see Kaidan. It felt like more of the puzzle pieces were falling into place. Hell, Garrus, it's been two years. Part of me wants things to be just like old times with Kaidan. The company was nice. The physical contact..." She sighed. "The other part of me realizes that we are both different now and that we both need to move on. Hell, I'm trying to figure out if I'm even all back."

"Hmm, I _know_ that you're back, Shepard. In case you weren't aware, turians are great at judging character. I'd know it if you weren't _you_."

Shepard smiled at her friend. "Thanks, Garrus." She perked up a little in her seat. "Now, what did you get me?"

Garrus' blue eyes twinkled as he pulled out a small box. It was a model ship of a turian cruiser.

Shepard's smile widened.

* * *

"What kind of anomaly did EDI pick up, Shepard?" Garrus asked, securing his Viper to his back.

"There weren't any specifics - just signals resembling Blood Pack transmissions. I figured since we were in the area, we'd check it out, maybe take out a few comm towers," Shepard replied, securing her own weapons. "I know how much you love dealing with mercs."

Garrus half-chuckled, "Right."

"Approaching the LZ, Commander," EDI's voice chimed. The shuttle doors slid open, revealing a thick blanket of fog over the vegetative landscape. Shepard hopped out and clutched her Avenger.

"I know this is your first mission with us, Krios, so I'll fill you in on something: she never takes us anywhere nice," Garrus chided as he followed the commander out of the shuttle.

The red orbs of Thane's breather fixed onto the turian as he descended into the fog. Thane dropped silently behind, looking around the obscured scene. The fog hindered his vision, but he was pretty sure that he could see about three times as well as his companions. A large creature roared off in the distance.

"This is problematic," Garrus whispered to the group.

"Commander, I believe that I have a slight advantage here in terms of vision. Allow me to scout ahead and provide some guidance," Thane offered, readying his grip on his Shuriken.

"Alright, Krios, you're up," Shepard agreed, "We'll be right behind you."

Shepard watched as the glowing eyes of the assassin's mask disappeared into the fog.

"Well Shepard, if Krios were to double-cross you, this would be the perfect opportunity," Garrus said as he followed the blue lights of the commander's armor.

"Believe me, Garrus, there have been plenty of opportunities. Hell, he could probably kill us both with one of Gardner's spoons and a napkin."

Garrus hummed with amusement as they continued to push forward.

"Commander," Thane called from ahead, "there is some sort of beacon here."

Shepard followed the faint red lights ahead and stepped next to the assassin. She scanned the terminal with her omni. "It's a navigation beacon," Shepard informed, keying at the console. There was a sudden buzz of electricity as a bright blue beam pierced through the fog, pointing off into the distance.

"I take it this will guide us to the comm tower," Thane observed.

"Seems like it," Shepard agreed, "Everyone stay sharp."

They advanced cautiously under the guiding beam when another roar bellowed through the blanketed landscape. They were approaching the source of the sound when the flapping of large wings filled the air. Thane, who had taken point again, suddenly stopped.

"Amonkira reveals them!" the assassin exclaimed as he fired into the fog.

Shepard narrowed her eyes as a large, black shadow appeared in the mist. The outline becoming more familiar as the dark figure approached.

"Klixen!" the commander shouted, firing at the approaching creature. She had encountered them before, the large beings that spat venom and exploded upon destruction.

"Don't get overrun!" Garrus cried as he added his own firepower.

The large, insect-like beings continued one by one out of the fog, massing a cloaked front against the trio. Shepard's Avenger beeped angrily from overheating as she hastily ejected a thermal clip.

"Shit!" Shepard cried in frustration.

"Shepard, where are you?" Garrus shouted into the haze. He had lost line of sight.

"I'm here, Garrus! This damn thing overheated again!" Shepard panted, slamming in another clip. She raised her weapon and her eyes widened as three klixen began to surround her. _I'll be damned if I let these giant bugs take me out._ She thought to herself. She raised her hand, summoning what biotics she could to slam one of the creatures. It fell, but did not remain down for long.

Suddenly, the assassin appeared by her side, glowing vibrantly in an aura of neon blue. In an instant, a wave of energy shot from the drell's form and one of the klixen exploded. Thane's biotics continued to flare as he fired at one of the remaining creatures. Shepard took out the other, her heart pounding furiously in her chest.

"Are you alright, Commander?" Thane asked, the glowing red eyes of his breather peered down into her helmet.

Shepard nodded, trying to catch her breath, "Yes. Thank you, Krios."

Garrus stumbled out of the fog, "There's another beacon," he informed, once he realized that Shepard was okay.

The commander stepped forward and activated the console, generating another beam. The trio set forth once more...

* * *

 It was a quiet ride back to the Normandy after the stressful, yet successful mission. The Blood Pack communication towers had been destroyed, crippling their hold on the area and Shepard now had the location of a weapons production facility. Apparently, the mercenary group had begun to prepare for some kind of war - plotting to take control of the galaxy's major resources. Shepard closed her eyes and leaned her head back. It was always something.

They landed without incident in the hangar and Garrus rose from his seat, "That was some nice work, Krios. Damn fine shooting," the former C-Sec officer complimented.

Thane inclined his head.

"Do you need me for anything at the moment, Shepard?" Garrus asked. "If not, I'm going to have a look at your Avenger in the armory. I want to install a new heat sink to help with the overheating."

Shepard shook her head, "Thanks, Garrus. I'll catch up with you later."

Garrus pulled off his healmet and stashed it in an armored locker nearby.

Shepard pulled off her own helmet, her hair a hopeless mess, and turned her attention to the assassin. "Thank you again, Krios. I don't know how that would have played out with the klixen if you hadn't of jumped in when you did."

Thane pulled off his breather, "No need to thank me, Commander," his voice rumbled quietly, "I am sure that you would have figured something out." He paused for a moment, quirking an eyeridge slightly at the human woman, "I... I did not know you were a biotic."

"A limited one. I've not really devoted much training toward that - I'm more of a kick-in-the-door and start shooting type," Shepard said, heading for her storage locker.

"That continues to be made apparent," Thane replied, watching the commander as she stowed away her helmet.

Shepard looked at the drell curiously and smirked, "Is that a joke, Krios?"

Thane straightened in his posture, folding his arms behind his back.

"Well," Shepard continued, "maybe you can show me a thing or two. Those were some fancy displays. It seems you are a man of many talents, Krios."

Thane offered a small bow, "As you wish, Commander."

"Shepard."

Thane stood fully and tilted his head, quietly asking for clarification.

"Just call me Shepard. No need for formalities. This isn't a military mission. I'm part of the crew, just like you are, Krios."

Thane was taken aback slightly by the commander's words, yet he considered her request as her eyes, warm and friendly, stared into his own. For once the tables had turned and it was he who was now a bit uncomfortable in her presence. He inclined his head, "Very well, Shepard."

Shepard gave a small smile placed a hand on the assassin's arm, patting it approvingly. "I'll leave you to your meditations," she said, her tone was respectful, understanding.

Thane did not reply, only watching her with silent appreciation as she headed for the elevator.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For more information about the Blood Pack mission, please visit: http://www.ign.com/wikis/mass-effect-2/N7_-_Blood_Pack_Communications_Relay. It's a pretty cool side mission.


	3. Like a Moth to a Flame

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When Thane signed up for the mission against the Collectors, he did not set out to make friends. The rest of the galaxy didn't seem to care.

"So, you're him, huh? The hot drell who could kill you with his pinky?"

_Hot drell?_

Shepard closed her eyes and mentally groaned.  _I can't take her anywhere._ She drifted as she looked over at the assassin who, as usual, remained unflinched and self-assured. Thane  _was_ hot, classically tall, dark, and handsome with the air of mystery. Watching him in action was like witnessing a cobra, lunging out from the shadows to hunt its prey. Thane was incredibly hot - she just would never admit that to him, especially not as brashly as she had just heard. Shepard wondered if Thane would respond.

_He wouldn't. He's too dignified. He's -_

Thane's voice pulled her from her thoughts.

The assassin had furrowed his brow in confusion, "Hot drell? I'm afraid I do not understand your meaning."

Jack scoffed and shuffled in her seat, "You know hot. Attractive, sexy..."

Shepard stared intensely at the other woman, trying to catch her attention before she got too far out in those waters.

"...fuckable."

_Crass._

Thane raised an eyeridge and glanced to his side, to look at the commander, who had conveniently decided to look out the shuttle window. Shepard could feel the intensity of the assassin's stare upon her, but there was no way in hell that she would look over at him. After Jacob's interrogation and now this: Jack's sexual harassment, she wouldn't fault Thane at all if he decided to leave. It seemed as if her crew were out of control.

"Ms," Thane started, but was quickly cut off.

"No 'Ms.' it's Jack. Just Jack. Fuck that polite shit."

Shepard startled herself with the loud sigh that escaped her mouth.

Thane eyed the young, marked woman seated across from him. Though small in stature, he knew that Jack was a powerful biotic, unhinged and immature, but powerful none-the-less. In that moment, he had instinctively devised five ways to eliminate her before she could rise to her feet.

"Jack. Perhaps it is my... unfamiliarity with human customs, but this conversation hardly seems... appropriate."

Jack laughed, "I'm far from appropriate, Krios, but relax, you're not my type. I just wanted to know what all the hype was about after that Fornax picture went around."

Normally, Shepard was not the sort to embarrass easily, but this situation was definitely uncomfortable. She felt her cheeks warm.

"Shepard, you're approaching the LZ," EDI informed, breaking through the thick layer of awkward tension.

_Oh, thank God._

"Thank you EDI," Shepard said hastily. She had chosen Thane and Jack to accompany her due to the confined nature of the mission ahead. It had only been about a week since they had stopped the Blood Pack mercenary group from starting a galactic turf way. This time, the Blue Suns had been wrecking havoc. Mercs. It seemed like while they were searching for a path to the Collectors, mercs were always causing a distraction. It was frustrating. She watched as the shuttle descended near surface.

"Shepard," EDI started again, "scans detect an Alliance colony defended by a Javelin MKII missile base. A distress signal indicates that the base is compromised by batarians who have launched two missiles at the Alliance colony..."

_Perfect. Just fucking perfect._

EDI continued, "Total destruction of the colony is imminent. Zero probability of survivors if the missiles strike. Find the control panel in the Javelin MKII missile base. Time of impact calculated. Landing party will have five minutes to deactivate the missiles after shuttle touchdown."

Shepard reached for her Avenger and activated her incendiary clips. "It's never a dull moment around here," she said, rising to her feet.

* * *

 

Shepard padded quietly through the mess as she headed for Gardner's station. It was designated sleep time for the majority of the Normandy's crew, but increasingly, Shepard found herself unable to sleep. Her mind was always occupied and no 'scripts from Dr. Chakwas seemed to be effective. She was not sure if that was an unintended side effect of her revival, perhaps the cybernetics caused her to need less sleep. Still, it was starting to weigh on her. 

It was during these restless times that she would often lie in bed, hypnotically watching the fish in her aquarium swim by. Sometimes she would go down to the cargo hold to exercise. On other occasions, she would wander the ship, freely thinking her thoughts without encountering another soul. Most times though, Shepard found herself in Gardner's kitchen, looking for something warm to hold between her hands. Her motions were automatic as she reached for a canister of dried leaves. Tea. A stash that she had procured from Earth. Black, a spiced citrus blend. It was her grounding point, a piece of her home world that she had not seen in so long. She inhaled deeply and closed her eyes.

"Trouble sleeping?" a smooth voice asked from the tables behind her.

Shepard opened her eyes, leaving the fantasy of Earth behind and returning to the quiet hum of the Normandy. She turned around, her eyes slowly adjusting to a figure sitting in the shadows. 

Krios.

The assassin was relaxed in his posture, his dark eyes intent in their gaze upon her. Reading her, discretely learning. A small mug sat before him.

"No," Shepard finally said, "too much to think about."

Thane hummed in agreement, "I'm sure. You've set out to do one task - defeat the Collectors - and so far you've been drawn to put out other fires."

Shepard fidgeted with the container in her hands, "Yeah. Nothing is ever that simple. At least not with me."

Thane's brown furrowed slightly in thought, "You did save the colony, Shepard. I hope that choice is not weighing on your mind."

The commander laughed slightly, "No. Of course not, Krios. I just know that I'm going to hear about it from Alliance brass."

The assassin tilted his head, "I thought that you were no longer in the Alliance?"

Shepard's face quieted as her thoughts drifted briefly to Kaidan and Horizon. No. She was no longer Alliance and it seemed there'd be no going back - especially if this truly was a suicide mission.

"It's complicated," she finally uttered, ending the discussion for that topic. Thane inclined his head, taking the hint.

"Why are you awake, Krios, and how long have you been watching me out here?"

Thane leaned forward. He had attempted to rest. He always did whenever the opportunity presented itself, but truthfully, he had not known the meaning of the word for nearly ten years. His body, for as long as it would last, simply existed. No pleasures. No pain. No rest. The darkness always brought the demons - the ones that chased away the sunset, leaving the cold isolation of night. 

"Like you, Shepard, there is a lot that weighs on my mind," Thane said as his fingers danced along the side of his mug. "As for watching you, you know that I prefer the shadows. It's an excellent means to learn about someone without inference. Pure observation." He watched as Shepard shifted in her stance and felt part of his resolve soften. He did not want her to be uncomfortable. "I was sitting here when you came in, but you seemed to be preoccupied. I did not wish to disturb you. When I saw you so... transfixed by your tea, I wanted to make my presence known."

"You partake?" Shepard asked, gesturing slightly toward the small cup on the table.

Thane nodded, "I do. Tea is somewhat of a ritual for me. It's an experience... an escape. It seems that is true for you as well."

It was weird for Shepard to think of having tea as a ritual, but it definitely was an escape, a moment of peace in a chaotic and demanding existence. 

"It is," Shepard finally agreed, "it's a little piece of Earth, my home world," she said, wrapping her fingers tightly around the canister.

"I understand," Thane said, rising to his feet. He walked toward the commander, his steps silent and purposeful. "May I?" he asked, extending his hand out to her.

Shepard hesitated for a moment, yet she placed the small container in the drell's hand. She watched as he swirled it gently across his nose.

"Hmm, pleasant," Thane rumbled quietly as he moved toward the sink, preparing the water, and carefully portioning out some of the leaves into an infuser. He slid his fingers into his jacket and retrieved a small tin. "I assure you, Shepard, I am not trying to poison you. I prefer... other, more intimate methods."

_More intimate..._

Shepard swallowed and quirked an eyebrow as amusement pulled at the corner of her mouth.

"So you do crack jokes, Krios?"

"Occasionally," Thane returned in a serious tone as he sprinkled some of the power from the tin into the infuser as well. It smelled almost like cinnamon. After a few more minutes, he finished preparing the tea and poured some into the commander's mug.

"Now... try this. It will help you sleep."

Shepard picked up the cup and inhaled deep, letting the aroma fill her senses and relax her mind. "It doesn't work for you?" she asked, curiously. One should always be wary of a chef who does not eat his own preparations.

Thane shook his head, staring off in thought. "No. Not anymore."

Shepard started at the assassin for a moment, wrestling with trust She finally pursed her lips to blow gently at and took a cautious sip.

It was heaven.

If heaven existed.

"Oh my..." Shepard drifted, closing her eyes.

"Acceptable?" Thane asked, his dark eyes taking in the expressions of bliss on the commander's face.

Shepard nodded gratefully, "Very acceptable. Whatever you added... it complements the other flavors nicely. What was that?"

Thane gave a thin smile, "It's a family secret, a blend of berries and spices that are found on the drell home world of Rakanna. I am glad that you enjoy it."

Shepard opened her eyes and, "Thank you, Krios," she said, taking another sip.

Thane hummed, "If we are going to share in tea, then Thane, please," the assassin's voice vibrated deeply, "work formalities tend to make the tea taste... sour."

Shepard looked up in surprise and inclined her head, "Fair enough," she agreed. This was going well. This was the most Thane had talked since... ever. Shepard found that she was enjoying this informal encounter. Yet, there was something that she wanted to address.

"Listen, about earlier with Jack," Shepard started again, "She's..."

"Forget about it, Shepard," Thane interrupted, "you don't have to keep apologizing for your crew. While the..." Thane searched for the right words, "... _compliments_ were crude, I am not so easily offended."

 _Thankfully._ Shepard thought to herself, nodding in understanding. 

Thane continued to watch the commander as she further indulged. It had been a long time since he had shared a simple moment like this. Shepard's eyes closed again and she sighed in fatigue.

"You should return to your quarters, Shepard. The tea will catch up with you sooner than you think. I'd prefer not to have to carry you."

"Yeah," Shepard said hazily, "I do feel like I could actually get some sleep now." She washed her mug and set it off to the side. "Thank you again Kri... Thane," she corrected as she quietly made her way to the elevator.

Thane nodded, distracted briefly by the sound of his name coming from the commander's lips - soft, appreciative, and tired. The tone was certainly in contrast to her battlefield cries or even her Normandy commands. He had glimpsed the woman and not the legend.  _Her._ Thane frowned slightly as a stray, surprising thought crossed his mind.

_It was my pleasure, Shepard._

* * *

 

Shepard stirred in bed, becoming faintly aware of a pulsating tone cutting through the silence. An alarm - no - a message alert. She opened her eyes, realizing that she had been sleeping for - she looked over at her clock - eight hours. 

_That tea..._

Her senses roused as she became fully aware and she jolted out of bed.

"What is it, EDI?" Shepard asked, hastily straightening her clothes. She must have just collapsed onto her bed from the night before.

"It's me, Commander," Joker informed over the intercom, "message coming though. It's Admiral Hackett."

"Patch it in, Joker," Shepard said, mentally shaking her head. She rushed up the stairs.

_Here it is._

"Commander Shepard," the admiral greeted over the speaker.

"Admiral, what can I do for you?" Shepard returned.

"Back from the dead only a few weeks and causing a ruckus already?" 

The admiral's voice was stern, yet Shepard could detect a hint of humor. She respected Hackett - admired him. He was almost as much of a father figure to her as Anderson was.

"You know me, Admiral, never a dull moment."

"You're right about that. I just heard that one of my space ports was destroyed by my own missiles on Watson. You want to tell me what that was all about?" Hackett asked.

"Yes, Sir," Shepard said firmly. She explained how she had been tracking various mercenary activities in the galaxy and how, by following some leads on the Blue Suns, was led to the Alliance colony on Watson. She also shed light on the confrontation with the rogue band of batarians and the missiles that had been launched upon her arrival. The admiral listened patiently.

"Do you mind sending me a report, Shepard?" Hackett asked, "you were a good soldier - hell, you still are - but anything that you can give me will help put out these rumors that this was a Cerberus terrorist attack against Alliance interests. That colony site and all the resources that went into it are forfeit now. I've got to explain this."

Shepard nodded sharply, "I'll get that to you within the hour, Sir."

"Very good, Shepard. Hackett out."

Shepard pushed away from her desk and sighed. At least she had already started the report.

* * *

It had been a pretty uneventful day after Shepard filed her report on the lost Alliance base on Watson. Briefings. Rounds. Readings. She'd even managed to get in a workout with Jacob and Garrus. For the first time since she woke up from the operating table in that secret Cerberus lab, she felt rested. Perhaps she could get Krios - Thane - to spill the details on his family secret. As Shepard rode the lift down from her quarters, she pondered a bit over her shared moment with the assassin. Shepard has made it a point to try to bond with all of her crew, even the temperamental Jack and Zaeed, though she realized now that they were both misunderstood. She had not intended to bond with the assassin - especially after his declaration of not wanting to make friends.

In all honesty, Shepard tried not to notice Thane Krios outside of working together on missions. She tried not to notice how fluidly he moved in combat, how his body simply reacted on the field. Flawlessly. She tried not to notice how the smooth vibrations of his voice lingered with her long after briefings ended. She tried not to notice how his fingertips lightly grazed, knowingly, over his rifle. She tried not to notice those dark eyes, those deep eyes that were always watching. She tried not to notice him because she... because things with Kaidan were still unclear.

Still... last night did feel like bonding. 

The icon for Deck 3 lit up and the doors opened. Shepard stepped out, heading for Miranda's office. She touched the controls, signaling for entry.

"Come in," Miranda greeted. She looked up from her consoles as Shepard stepped inside. "Shepard, still no word from the Illusive Man, although, you may find this next dossier to be of interest," she said, holding up a datapad. "It's an old friend."

Sheppard stepped forward and glanced at the glowing lines, "Tali?"

_Expert in combat tech, systems hacking, strong engineering background, familiar with the Normandy._

The commander looked up, "She was caring for Veetor, after Freedom's Progress."

"Well," Miranda said, stretching a bit in her seat, "apparently, she's on some secret mission on Haestrom."

"Haestrom?" Shepard asked.

"It's a former quarian colony, now controlled by the geth. I don't know how much back up she has, Shepard, but if Haestrom is a geth stronghold, I'd suggest we set course immediately."

Shepard nodded in agreement, "EDI?"

"I've send the coordinates to Mr. Moreau, Shepard. We should arrive in four hours," EDI responded.

"Who do you want for a team?" Miranda asked. 

"Shepard, if I may," EDI began, "Haestrom is not suited well for humans. The solar radiation from its sun will overload the shields with prolonged exposure."

Miranda frowned.

"I'll take Garrus and..." Shepard's mind raced through all over her crew. Hot, probably dry. Arid. "...and Thane."

"Thane?" Miranda asked, lifting a perfect brow, "Are you on a first name basis?"

Shepard parted her lips to retort, but nothing came out. She blushed slightly.

"Oh, just wait until I tell Kasumi," the Cerberus op gushed, "I called it. I knew from that moment in Nassana's penthouse that you were interested."

"What?" Shepard asked, shaking her head in disbelief. "Oh, don't even go there, Miranda, you were smitten too, just like Kasumi." Shepard scoffed, "You two and that damned Fornax!"

Miranda laughed, "Relax, Shepard, who cares about a silly infatuation. Enjoy it."

"Yeah, well, the guy's not here to make friends, Miranda. Besides, this is hardly the time," Shepard said crossing her arms and leaning back. 

 Miranda smirked.

"Of course, Shepard. I'll have Jacob take a look at your shielding for the mission," at her console.

"Thank you," Shepard replied as she left the small office. "EDI, please have Garrus and Thane meet me in the briefing room in an hour."

"Of course, Shepard, will that be all?" EDI responded.

"Yes, thank you."

"Logging you out, Shepard."

 _Tali._ Shepard thought to herself.  _What have you gotten yourself into now?_ She had to laugh. The young quarian seemed to share the same knack for stumbling into trouble. Ever since Saren, Tali was a friend. No, more than that. She and Garrus had become family. Wrex too.

As Shepard headed toward the lift, her thoughts were interrupted by a blur of multitude of colors, short, bald, surly - Jack - headed for... Life Support?

Shepard opened her mouth to speak, "Ja-"

"Commander," Kelly greeted, "I was hoping to catch you. Do you have a moment?"

Shepard looked down the hall to the closing Life Support doors and turned back to the yeoman. Her face was unable to mask her confusion.

"We can talk later if you'd like?" Kelly offered.

Shepard shook her head, "No, it's fine. Share a lift to CIC?"

The yeoman nodded. 

Before the doors slid close, a three digit hand slipped in, holding the doors open and Garrus Vakarian stepped inside.

"Excuse me, ladies," the turian said smoothly, "hate to interrupt."

Shepard tried to hide her amusement at the grin that spread over the yeoman's face. Garrus noticed as well and nodded politely to the young woman.

"Ms. Chambers."

A flush of color spread across Kelly's face. "Officer Vakarian."

Garrus shifted uncomfortably and it took all of Shepard's discipline not to laugh.

"Well, uh, Shepard. Got word that we're heading out on a mission."

Shepard nodded, "It's Tali."

Garrus' mandibles flared in surprise, "Tali?" he repeated softly. "You sure?"

"I looked at the dossier myself though, she may be in some trouble. I'll discuss the details with you and Thane during the briefing," Shepard informed.

Garrus stared quietly at his friend for a moment.

"What?" Shepard asked. Kelly remained silent in the background.

"Thane, huh? So, we're on a first name basis now?" the turian asked with a chuckle.

The elevator doors slid open to the CIC and Shepard gestured for Kelly to exit first. As the commander moved to leave next, she threw up a finger, giving her beloved friend an answer to his question.

"I know what that means, Shepard! Jack's been on board long enough!" Garrus replied, slipping out and heading for the armory. "I'll catch you and  _Thane_ later."

"Goodbye, Garrus!" Kelly cried with a little too much eagerness.

"Kelly?" Shepard asked, getting the yeoman's attention, "what did you want to discuss?"

* * *

Shepard stepped out of the shower and quickly put on her ship ware. It was good to have Tali on board. Haestrom was a mess and the young quarian had gotten herself into a pinch, but luckily they had arrived in time to lend Kal'Reeger a hand. Thankfully, Shepard had talked 'Reeger down from needlessly sacrificing himself and now, he was on his way back to the Migrant Fleet.

Tali had agreed to join the Normandy once more to lend her technical expertise to the mission. Shepard was grateful. Garrus was too. She had noticed, on the way back, the lingered hug that was shared between the two former crewmates. There was something there, Shepard was sure of it and it was nice to see. She'd tease them about it later.

The commander smoothed her hair down as she secured it into its usual twist, pinning it into place. It was time for her rounds. The young krogan, Grunt, was getting anxious in his quarters and she had a message from Miranda as well. What Shepard had found herself most interested in, was getting around to checking on Thane - especially with having caught Jack entering the assassin's quarters in such haste. Had he been there? Was the visit expected?  _Probably not._ Still, the curiosity was getting the better of her. She grabbed her datapad and whisked out of her quarters.

* * *

Shepard had not been able to satisfy her curiosity between the mysterious meeting of Thane and Jack, which had occurred a few more times. In fact, as her duties seemed to double down over the past week, there was no time to be had at all.

Grunt's destructive outbursts required an immediate trip to Tuchanka, which also led to an unexpected reunion with Urdnot Wrex. Or, as the krogan had so affectionately called himself, "Uncle Urdnot." It had been damn good to see him again - even after the stunt on Virmire. The newly elected clan leader diagnosed the young krogan with a severe case of adolescence and explained that a series of rituals were needed as a rite of passage. Wrex had not disclosed that one of the rites consisted of batteling a thresher maw on foot. Shepard later addressed that oversight with a couple of head butts and two helpings of ryncol.

Mordin also had business on Tuchanka, looking for his former student, Maelon. That confrontation had been hard on Mordin, who was coming to terms with the gruesome reality of the krogan genophage. They both agreed to keep Maelon's research data, so that the deaths of the krogans, who had sacrificed themselves for the sake of a cure, would not be in vain.

The crew had also journeyed back to Illium. Miranda had asked for assistance with relocating her twin sister, Oriana. It had originally been a background, out-of-sight mission; however, Kasumi and Shepard had convinced Miranda that she should make herself known while there was still time to do so. It had been a touching reunion.

The return to Illium also allowed for the recruitment of the asari justicar, Samara, who was just as powerful as she was beautiful. Zaeed had honed in on that fact, albeit with less tact and more along the lines of, "Nice set." At least Grunt had behaved himself on the mission, simply enjoying being in a firefight.

Shepard released the breath that she had been holding and looked over at the ship's clock. She had been lying down for two hours now, having returned back into the habit of minimal sleep. Maybe Thane was still awake and, if so, maybe she could finally appease her nosey self.

"EDI, is Thane awake?" Shepard asked, nipping at the corner of her lip.

"Mr. Krios' vitals indicate that he is, Shepard. Shall I open a comm?" the AI asked.

"No, that won't be necessary. Thank you, EDI."

"Logging you out, Shepard."

* * *

 

Thane gripped the stone in his hand tighter as his mind sought out memories - suppressed visions of sunset colored eyes... He had vowed never to become interested again in any kind of relationship outside of business, yet this mission was becoming more and more involved. Shepard has demonstrated time and time again that she  _cared_ about each of her crew and he... he had cared for her that night he had told her to use his first name. He had promised not to make friends. Friendship was dangerous, distracting. The price was too high when things went wrong. And, yet...

_My name gently escapes her lips. The sound is soft, kind, yet breathy from her fatigue. It reminds me of her... when she used to call me to bed after losing myself in my work. Shepard is grateful for the tea. The chance to rest. 'It was my pleasure, Shepard.' This... this is not... she is not..._

Thane's nails dug into his palm as he squeezed the stone harder. The sound of the door request brought him back to the present. He slipped the stone into his jacket and made his way to the door. His visitor made him wonder if his gods were testing his devotion.

"Shepard," he acknowledged, "is everything alright?" It was a bit late for the commander's rounds.

Shepard rubbed her shoulder, realizing the randomness of her visit. She felt a little bad. "Yes. I... I hope that I'm not disturbing you, Thane. I just... I can't..." Shepard drifted.

"You can't sleep again?" Thane finished.

Shepard nodded, "Do you have a few minutes to talk?"

Thane stepped to the side and allowed her to enter.

"Thank you," Shepard said as she moved past the assassin's long, lean form, "may I sit?" she asked, wanting to be respectful of the man's space.

While Thane had become more visible on missions and team briefings, he was still a recluse when it came to social, informal gatherings. The impromptu moment they had shared in the mess had been unexpected. Nice. She wanted to interact more. Thane nodded to her and she sat down at the small table, her back to the Normandy's core. Thane settled across from her.

"What did you wish to discuss?" he asked, reading over her face. The woman was tired. 

"You," Shepard began a bit too eagerly, surprising herself, "you are an assassin, trained by the hanar to kill quickly and efficiently. You are a reclusive, yet incredibly profound, ever observant, prayerful, courteous man who makes an incredible cup of tea. How?"

Humans could be so forthright.

Thane turned his head slightly, curious about the outburst from a typically composed woman. "How what, Shepard? I do not understand your inquiry."

"Why are you  _here_ Thane? A man like you..."  _Handsome._ "...with your skills..."  _Efficiently deadly._ "...you could do anything, live affluently anywhere, probably have anyone, you don't make sense here." Shepard paused for a moment, taken aback by the words tumbling out of her mouth. It was rude, she knew it, but frankly, she didn't care. She felt drawn to him, like a moth to a flame, and she wanted to know more about him.

"Are you dissatisfied by my performance?" Thane asked, his eyes boor into hers.

"No, of course not.".

"Then why does it matter if my presence doesn't make sense?I agreed to be here. Here I am. Here I will stay until the mission is complete."

Shepard leaned back into her chair and a silence fell between them. The assassin finally shook his head.

"Humans are extremely inquisitive - always wanting to know any and everything about someone. There is little regard for social boundaries."

"So instead of watching someone from the shadows, we prefer to ask them directly," Shepard countered.

Thane huffed in amusement and straightened in his seat, "A fair point. Drell and hanar have a symbiotic relationship, if you will. In exchange for sharing their home world with my people, my kind pledged service to the hanar and it is an honor to serve. When I was chosen to be trained as an assassin, I was six years old. So, while I have learned much along the way from encountering different species, studying them, learning the varied customs, including about my own as a drell, I grew as a man, yet, I was still an assassin, an instrument, a vessel for my gods. It is all that I know, Shepard. There has been a high price to pay for this life... but this is my path."

Shepard frowned, "You are a man, Thane, not just an assassin. Just as I am a woman and not just a soldier. I saw that for myself that night in the mess."

 _No. This cannot continue._ Thane quirked an eyeridge, "Are you certain that you are not projecting what you wish to see on me? A product of all this hot drell research that took place when I was recruited? You are my employer, Shepard, granted without pay. My odds of survival increase if you are of sound health and mind. It would be in my best interest to help you."

Shepard shook her head and laughed mockingly, "Now you're full of shit."

Thane's face remained solemn, unyielding.

"Why has Jack been visiting you?"

There was a flinch of surprise in those dark, piercing eyes.

"Have you been spying on me, Shepard?" Thane rumbled.

"No. I've just been observant. I've seen her rush in here a few times now. Why?"

Thane's eyes narrowed slightly in suspicion. "Jack asked me for some... assistance with a personal issue."

"A personal issue? Is she alright?" Shepard asked.

"I would say so, yes. After the Watson mission, Jack asked me about my biotic abilities. She wanted to know how I... how did she put it... used my  _zen shit_ to maintain a level head and perfect execution." Thane leaned forward and clasped his hands. "I didn't quite catch her meaning at the time, but after a bout of profane-laced explanations, I realized she wanted help controlling her abilities. I agreed to assist, starting with meditation."

Shepard did not realize that she had been staring with her mouth agape, trying to process what she had just heard. 

"You're helping Jack with her powers?"

Thane nodded, "Yes, as I offered with you. I admit, I was surprised by her asking me for guidance. She is powerful - asari powerful - yet she is undisciplined.

Shepard was quiet for a moment, eyeing the assassin, taking in his handsome features. A slow smile crept over her face.

"You've shown your hand, Mr. Krios. You  _do_ care and I think that you have made a friend - not who I would have originally picked, but a friend none-the-less. Helping Jack does not benefit you. She is not your employer and you owe her nothing. You  _want_  to help her and you are."

The assassin hummed quietly, secretly marveling at the woman before him.

"Why are you so afraid to make friends, Thane?" Shepard asked.

The memory was on him before he could deflect the question.

_Laser dot trembles on the target's skull. One finger twitch, he dies. The smell of spice on the spring wind. Sunset-colored eyes, defiant in the scope._

Thane's words stopped abruptly as he tore himself from the intrusive memory. The stone, hidden in his jacket pocket pressed hard against his chest.

"What was that?" Shepard asked, a bit startled by the sudden change in the conversation.

"I..." Thane frowned slightly, "drell have perfect memory. We can recall scenes in minute detail. Sometimes, we also slip into a memory if our focus waivers, living it as if it were happening in the present moment."

"So that was a memory? It sounded like one of your jobs."

"It was."

"So, how do you maintain focus?" the commander asked.

"Exercise... reading... meditation, which I should be tending to shortly," Thane said, trying to find a polite way to end the conversation. He was unnerved by the human commander. She had unknowingly gained ground on him, much to his disliking. Or was it to his intrigue? He'd never met a human like Shepard before.

"Is that your solution for everything? Meditation?"

Thane gave a thin smile, "Often," he whispered as he leaned back again. "It would serve you as well... with your insomnia and with honing in your biotics. You should look into it."

"Hmm," Shepard said, sliding out from her seat, "are you going to teach me?" 

Thane tilted his head, the stone ever present in his pocket. He ignored it and nodded, "I can."

"Careful Thane," Shepard warned as she made her way to the doors, "you just might make another friend."

* * *

The next day was spent probing for minerals. Mordin had put in a request for more element zero for some biotic upgrades. Shepard has been waiting patiently throughout the day for the later hours, when the ship's activity died down. After a late dinner in the mess with Garrus and Tali, the crew settled into their various hidey holes and Shepard made her way to Life Support. 

"Shepard, as I told Jack, if I am to teach you, you must listen and follow my commands. Will that be a problem?" Thane asked.

Shepard lifted an eyebrow but shook her head.  

"Good," Thane said as he stepped toward her, flanking her side. "Now, the very first thing that we will discuss is posture. It is essential for adequate breathing, which leads to better focus and concentration. May I?" Thane asked, holding his arms open in front of her.

Shepard looked to her side and lightly ran her tongue over her lips. She nodded her consent.

The assassin touched her then, for the first time, placing one hand on the small of her back and the other on her shoulder, correcting her form. Shepard had not anticipated the shiver that moved through her body. His grip was firm, but he guided her fluidly into a pose that was open, lifting. 

"Now, take a deep breath on a four count. We will just breathe today and become aware of how the body moves to take in the air. Slow draw in, slow release out," Thane said as his hands remained touching the woman in front of him.

Shepard took in a breath as commanded and tried her best to focus on her body, her lungs, the count...

* * *

 

Her first lesson with Thane had been slow, but that was the case with learning any new skill. She would meet with him again for another lesson. As she entered the loft of her quarters, the blinking light of her message console caught her eye. She keyed at the screen and her eyes widened in surprise.

_To: Shepard_

_From: K. Alenko_

_RE: About Horizon..._

Shepard's eyes traced over the words of pain, remorse, confusion, fear... caution. It seemed they both were unsure of any path together, too much time had gone by and now, with Cerberus, too much trust had been lost. They could never go back. Not to Illos, not to before the accident, before her death. Things were different now. She glanced over to the photo on her desk. A handsome, smiling face beamed at her. She had hoped that it would help her to remember what it was like to love and be in love, but with her death, it felt that the part of her that loved Kaidan, that wanted to be with him was never resurrected in that Cerberus lab. Kaidan deserved to live his life free and clear from her and the chaos that always followed suit. She reached over to turn the frame on its face.

She laid down on her bed, willing the past away, and thinking of how Thane had said that he silenced the past with meditation. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath, counting to four as he had instructed. Her thoughts seem to drift back to the assassin's hands that were on her and how much she had wanted to touch him in return.


End file.
